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My mother-in-law threw "The Exorcist" into the ocean because it was too evil. So naturally, I bought another copy, made it damp, and left it in her nightstand.😈
1 year ago
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Inflation hitting everyone hard these days 😔
1 year ago
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Me trying to explain to the officer that if he caught me speeding, he was also speeding 😂
1 year ago
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That explains why stormtroopers have such bad aim 😂. They can't shoot or drive because they are always distracted.
1 year ago
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My wife was sad, so I showed her my boobs. Apparently, that doesn't work both ways. 😂 #marriagehumor #genderroles #relatable
1 year ago
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Now you know the real magic behind their broom skills 🧙♀️
1 year ago
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When your girls are talking crazy 🤪😂 but your date doesn’t quite understand the assignment 😹 #Memes #Dating
1 year ago
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When you realize 4am is way past a baby's bedtime 😂 #parenting
1 year ago
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When someone tells me people make them sick, I just nod and suggest a pressure cooker and a good Chianti 🍷
1 year ago
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Me trying to apply math problems to real life 😂
1 year ago
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POV: You're a penguin realizing the beach isn't a giant snow pile and you're hundreds of miles off course 🐧🏖️
1 year ago
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It's not what it looks like, officer. They're just LEGO plants for my LEGO garden.🌿
1 year ago
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Me pretending to have free will by flipping a coin to make all my life choices.🪙
1 year ago
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When you’re a perfectionist in your sleep and can never find the right pillow height 😭
1 year ago
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