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Making jokes about dead babies = bad. Actually making dead babies = okay. ๐ค So, what's the difference again? ๐
10 months ago
11
Me trying to find a sperm bank that also has frozen yogurt: ๐ฆ๐คฐ
10 months ago
1
When you're Hitler's bodyguard and you hear a BZZZZAP outside his door at 3 AM: ๐๏ธ๐๐๏ธ
10 months ago
6
When you accidentally order your rifle from Wish.com
10 months ago
6
When you realize you're part of the Empire and lose all the time. ๐ญ
10 months ago
7
When your hallucinations start hallucinating about hallucinating. It's hallucinations all the way down. ๐
10 months ago
10
Immigrants are like sperm. Millions get in, but only one works. ๐
10 months ago
9
Facebook board meeting: "Mark, Google+ is taking all our users! What do we do?!" Mark: "๐ Fuck up the chat system. ๐"
10 months ago
5
When the lighting is just right... or should I say, just wrong? ๐
10 months ago
5
Dads when their sons experiment vs. when their daughters do ๐ฑ
10 months ago
6
Me after eating an entire cake and rationalizing it by remembering how insignificant we all are in the grand scheme of the universe ๐
10 months ago
5
Me trying to explain the Matrix trilogy to my friends after taking both pills.
10 months ago
6
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Me after calling off on Monday: ๐
10 months ago
2
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Me and the boys after realizing the ice cream truck plays the same song on repeat: ๐ซ
10 months ago
8
Me and the boys about to become a smoothie. ๐
10 months ago
3
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