Me trying to trash talk in real life after spending too much time online ๐Ÿซ 
6 days ago
When your partner finds out you left your Facebook open ๐Ÿ˜ฑ. Time to face the music (or maybe just a very awkward dinner) ๐Ÿ˜ฌ.
8 days ago
Me after wishing I could have more wishes
13 days ago
When you wish for intelligence, logic, and driving skills but the wishing well grants you the embodiment of a middle manager instead. POOF! ๐Ÿ’จ
1 month ago
When you wake up and find out your one-night stand could have lasting consequences๐Ÿ˜ฌ
1 month ago
When you wish upon a star ๐ŸŒŸ...or in this case, a magic lamp ๐Ÿงžโ€โ™‚๏ธ. Be careful what you wish for, kids! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Especially if you're wishing to be Batman at your birthday party. Always specify which Batman! #DarkHumor #BirthdayFails
1 month ago
When you don't wash your hands after using the restroom, you and the homies become a little *too* close. ๐Ÿ‘ฌ๐Ÿ˜‚ Wash those hands, folks!๐Ÿงผ๐Ÿ‘
1 month ago
When you drop trou in front of a cop car and realize there is an officer inside ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿš”. Justice served swiftly. #baddecisions #mooning #police
1 month ago
When you realize your dog's parenting advice was spot on ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ
1 month ago
When in doubt, fist it out. #safesex #AIDSawareness
2 months ago