When you try to "neg" a girl and it backfires spectacularly 😂 #smoothoperator #epicfail
When you try to "neg" a girl and it backfires spectacularly ๐Ÿ˜‚ #smoothoperator #epicfail
1 year ago
70
Me trying to convince Facebook I have a date for Valentine's Day 😂 #foreveralone
Me trying to convince Facebook I have a date for Valentine's Day ๐Ÿ˜‚ #foreveralone
1 year ago
74
Friend zone is a dangerous place. Many fall, few escape 😂
Friend zone is a dangerous place. Many fall, few escape ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
42
When you get arrested for loving your neighbor’s kid a little TOO much 😂 #valentinesdayfail #cupidgonewrong
When you get arrested for loving your neighborโ€™s kid a little TOO much ๐Ÿ˜‚ #valentinesdayfail #cupidgonewrong
1 year ago
68
When your ex's new boyfriend asks how the "used goods" are, but you're packing more than just two inches. 😏
When your ex's new boyfriend asks how the "used goods" are, but you're packing more than just two inches. ๐Ÿ˜
1 year ago
63
She said, if you get a tattoo of my initial, I’ll go out with you. Now I’m single with a permanent ‘K’ on my wrist. 😭
She said, if you get a tattoo of my initial, Iโ€™ll go out with you. Now Iโ€™m single with a permanent โ€˜Kโ€™ on my wrist. ๐Ÿ˜ญ
1 year ago
67
"How to start flirting with a woman" 
Step 1: Approach with confidence 
Step 2: Gently tap her with your foot to get her attention
Step 3: Run🏃‍♂️💨
"How to start flirting with a woman" Step 1: Approach with confidence Step 2: Gently tap her with your foot to get her attention Step 3: Run๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’จ
1 year ago
40
"Am I the only one you've ever been with?" 
"Yes. All the others were nines or tens." 
Me: 😂 I guess a solid 7 ain't so bad after all. #SolidSeven
"Am I the only one you've ever been with?" "Yes. All the others were nines or tens." Me: ๐Ÿ˜‚ I guess a solid 7 ain't so bad after all. #SolidSeven
1 year ago
66
Trying to understand women's logic is as hard as finding parking in NYC. 😂
Trying to understand women's logic is as hard as finding parking in NYC. ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
81
When you realize your ideal partner exists only in your mind ๐Ÿ˜‚ #RamboHousewife
1 year ago
39
Self-defense for women 101 😂. Step 1: Assume a guarded stance. Step 2: Begin discussing commitment. Step 3: Watch as male flees in terror. Works every time! 😉
Self-defense for women 101 ๐Ÿ˜‚. Step 1: Assume a guarded stance. Step 2: Begin discussing commitment. Step 3: Watch as male flees in terror. Works every time! ๐Ÿ˜‰
1 year ago
45
Leo, buddy, maybe try flowers first next time 😂
Leo, buddy, maybe try flowers first next time ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
48
Women want equality, but only when it suits them. Like when the bill comes at a fancy restaurant. Or when the 80 lb. box needs to be carried. 🤔
Women want equality, but only when it suits them. Like when the bill comes at a fancy restaurant. Or when the 80 lb. box needs to be carried. ๐Ÿค”
1 year ago
39
When you gotta coordinate pick-up and drop-off times with the side chick so she doesn't run into the main girl 😂 #RiskyBusiness
When you gotta coordinate pick-up and drop-off times with the side chick so she doesn't run into the main girl ๐Ÿ˜‚ #RiskyBusiness
1 year ago
80
Shooting your shot and accidentally hitting your crush's sister 😂
Shooting your shot and accidentally hitting your crush's sister ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
79