You don't cheat death. You just replace it. Chuck Norris got a promotion. 💀
You don't cheat death. You just replace it. Chuck Norris got a promotion. ๐Ÿ’€
4 months ago
251
When you mistake the Grim Reaper for your wife... that's one awkward ''til death do us part' moment. 💀😬
When you mistake the Grim Reaper for your wife... that's one awkward ''til death do us part' moment. ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ˜ฌ
11 months ago
279
Me trying to explain to my mom why I can't just chain all the elephants together and send them to the moon 🐘🚀🌕
Me trying to explain to my mom why I can't just chain all the elephants together and send them to the moon ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿš€๐ŸŒ•
1 year ago
164
"Woke up dead" 💀 has way more dramatic flair than "died in their sleep" 😴
"Woke up dead" ๐Ÿ’€ has way more dramatic flair than "died in their sleep" ๐Ÿ˜ด
1 year ago
293
💀💄💋 In 100 years, archaeologists will uncover the truth: we were all just skeletons trying to look fabulous for the 'gram. #priorities #beautyisbonesdeep😂
๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ’„๐Ÿ’‹ In 100 years, archaeologists will uncover the truth: we were all just skeletons trying to look fabulous for the 'gram. #priorities #beautyisbonesdeep๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
217
Me hoping death is like falling asleep at a party and being carried to bed, instead of what my sleep paralysis demon has planned.
Me hoping death is like falling asleep at a party and being carried to bed, instead of what my sleep paralysis demon has planned.
1 year ago
287
Me when my friend says they are gonna be a transformer and I unplug their life support
Me when my friend says they are gonna be a transformer and I unplug their life support
1 year ago
208
Me trying to give my friend a hug after they beat a Dark Souls boss for me 😂
Me trying to give my friend a hug after they beat a Dark Souls boss for me ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
217
Me after successfully navigating the self-checkout: "I am free!"
Me after successfully navigating the self-checkout: "I am free!"
1 year ago
131
When your ex takes ghosting to the next level 💀
When your ex takes ghosting to the next level ๐Ÿ’€
1 year ago
155
When you're Death, but Tommy keeps finding new ways to almost die.
When you're Death, but Tommy keeps finding new ways to almost die.
1 year ago
207
When you realize Whitney Houston's music really *was* dope after hearing about the cause of her death 💀
When you realize Whitney Houston's music really *was* dope after hearing about the cause of her death ๐Ÿ’€
1 year ago
133
Dylan is already contemplating the inevitable. 💀😂
Dylan is already contemplating the inevitable. ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
202
When you get what you wish for 💀
When you get what you wish for ๐Ÿ’€
1 year ago
220
Me and the boys on our way to tell Jim's wife he loves her after he got shot 12 times and his last words were 'What do you mean Jim rubs birds?'
Me and the boys on our way to tell Jim's wife he loves her after he got shot 12 times and his last words were 'What do you mean Jim rubs birds?'
1 year ago
125