Me trying to explain to my friends that lighting things on fire probably isnโ€™t the smartest idea when half the planet is on fire ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐ŸŒ
2 months ago
Apple's revolutionary "slide to unlock" technology, patent #1964022. Because no one has ever thought to slide a latch before. ๐Ÿ˜‚
2 months ago
Me after successfully navigating the self-checkout: "I am free!"
2 months ago
When you mistake the sun for the son of God ๐Ÿ˜‚
2 months ago
When inclusivity forgets to include the other side of the story ๐Ÿค”
2 months ago
People born before 1990 be like: "I can program the VCR and identify my gender, what more do you need?"
2 months ago
Me trying to get life advice from a magic 8 ball ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’€
3 months ago
When your partner says they like toys in the bedroom, but you're on different wavelengths ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
When you get arrested on Opposite Day, it means you're actually being set free... right? ๐Ÿค”๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
POV: You're chosen for the premium slave experience ๐ŸŽข
3 months ago
Me pretending to care about what day it is ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
When you water your plants but are worried they might grow up to be weeds ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
Me trying to sound professional online vs. how I actually come across ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
Me calculating how many extra peanuts I can sneak on board after they told me my bag was 3 lbs overweight ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
Apple: We totally invented "slide to unlock" ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago