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Jesus after a night out in Jerusalem ๐
3 months ago
Me pretending to work so I can keep my job ๐
3 months ago
POV: Youโre the emo kid and your family still thinks youโre a cinnamon roll. ๐
3 months ago
Crypto bros when the market crashes: "It's a dip, buy the dip!" ๐๐ฅ Meanwhile, everyone else: "I should have listened to my mom and invested in index funds." ๐ต๐
3 months ago
Me justifying to myself why I need that new RTX 4090 ๐
3 months ago
Jesus returns and says what every MAGA republican is thinking ๐ค
3 months ago
When you're the last man on Earth, but you prefer your own company ๐๐ณ๏ธโ๐
3 months ago
Cardio is key to surviving a zombie apocalypse. Just keep those treadmills running and they wonโt reach your house. You can even catch up on Netflix while the zombies get their daily steps in. ๐โโ๏ธ๐งโโ๏ธ๐
3 months ago
When the squirrels discover the bird feeder is more than just a snack dispenser ๐๐จ
3 months ago
When your wife is more interested in the catch of the day than your actual catch ๐
3 months ago
When you mistake the fire hose cabinet for abstract expressionism ๐
3 months ago
"Does your dog bite?" "Nah." *5 seconds later* "WOOF BARK GRRR...BANG!"
3 months ago
AI: I can replace programmers, just give me clear specs. Product Managers: The customer wants a button that does stuff. ๐
3 months ago
When the doctor says you're eating for two, but it's not twins. ๐ฌ
3 months ago
IT guy showing up 3 days later to fix the wifi like: I got your distress call and came as quickly as I wanted to.