Me trying to explain the Matrix trilogy to my friends after taking both pills.
6 months ago
Me after eating an entire cake and rationalizing it by remembering how insignificant we all are in the grand scheme of the universe 😂
6 months ago
Dads when their sons experiment vs. when their daughters do ðŸ˜ą
6 months ago
When the lighting is just right... or should I say, just wrong? 😂
6 months ago
When you leave your wallet at home after a big grocery shopping 😂
6 months ago
Me trying to be smooth at the checkout and failing miserably 😂
6 months ago
When your flight instructor says "practice your emergency landings anywhere" 💀✈ïļðŸŠĶ
6 months ago
Facebook board meeting: "Mark, Google+ is taking all our users! What do we do?!" Mark: "😈 Fuck up the chat system. 😈"
6 months ago
Immigrants are like sperm. Millions get in, but only one works. 😂
6 months ago
When your hallucinations start hallucinating about hallucinating. It's hallucinations all the way down. 😂
6 months ago
When you realize you're part of the Empire and lose all the time. 😭
6 months ago
Me after forgetting why I went into the kitchen, grabbing a soda and chilling on the couch, just to realize my diabetic gf is dying in the other room because I forgot her insulin in the fridge 😂
6 months ago
When you accidentally order your rifle from Wish.com
6 months ago
Europe: *Struggling to build a basic website*. USA: *Owns the entire internet* 😂
6 months ago
When the government's anti-terrorism campaign accidentally targets everyone. So, if you're carrying a camera, a laptop, a cell phone, or a suitcase...you might just be a terrorist. Don't forget the cookies!🍊
6 months ago