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When you tell your kids to sit down for the 50th time and they still don't listen ๐
1 year ago
170
When you get thrown back and start telling everyone about the bright light and the probing ๐ฝ๐ฃ
1 year ago
118
"Do you know who I am?"
"Of course, I do. I married your sister!" ๐
1 year ago
161
Me trying to figure out the important questions in life ๐ค๐
1 year ago
215
Me calculating if I can beat her man in a fight ๐ค
1 year ago
157
My wife was sad, so I showed her my boobs. Apparently, that doesn't work both ways. ๐ #marriagehumor #genderroles #relatable
1 year ago
210
That explains why stormtroopers have such bad aim ๐. They can't shoot or drive because they are always distracted.
1 year ago
190
When your ex is a nurse and they get to stitch you up after surgery ๐
1 year ago
188
Me trying to explain to the officer that if he caught me speeding, he was also speeding ๐
1 year ago
192
Inflation hitting everyone hard these days ๐
1 year ago
198
My car got broken into, but honestly, I'm more offended that they only ate the skin off my rotisserie chickens. Like, what kind of monster does that?! ๐ญ๐
1 year ago
134
When the doctor knows a little too much about your personal life ๐
1 year ago
115
My mother-in-law threw "The Exorcist" into the ocean because it was too evil. So naturally, I bought another copy, made it damp, and left it in her nightstand.๐
1 year ago
215
Me trying to find out if she's really into me or just being polite ๐
1 year ago
236
Is your man this cheesy? ๐ I guess it's time to get a new clock... or a new man? ๐ค