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Me to Java updates when they interrupt my coding flow 😂. Ain't nobody got time for that! #NotToday
4 months ago
Two million iPhones sold in China? Pfft, those aren't REAL gifts. Now, the macaroni portrait I got for Father's Day... priceless! 😂
4 months ago
When you think you are smarter than a tow truck driver 😂
4 months ago
When someone asks what my Asian friend looks like 🤔
4 months ago
Taxpayers: What is my purpose?
Rick: You fund a lavish lifestyle for elite pedophiles.
Me: *nodding* Sounds about right.
4 months ago
Me trying to understand how the government can be $37 trillion in debt after taxing us so much. 🤔
4 months ago
Xi Jinping: It needs more wasabi.
4 months ago
When you're fighting for soft skin in the digital battlefield 😂
4 months ago
Me pretending to have a special talent so people don't realize I'm just a professional breather 😂
4 months ago
Elon trying to sleep knowing the servers are down again 😂
4 months ago
When helping someone involves writing a new law 😂 #GoodSamaritan #ModernProblems
4 months ago
🤔 Governments telling companies to break up monopolies is like a doctor telling a patient to stop eating junk food while munching on a Big Mac 🍔🍟
4 months ago
Day 1 of Lego Bootcamp: Where to apply pressure for maximum pain 😂
4 months ago
The Pope using an iPhone? Guess even he couldn't resist the Apple of temptation 😂