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Me, realizing I was born too late to witness history and too early to partake in cosmic adventures, but just in time to casually browse for psychedelics on the dark web. ๐ธ๐ป๐
1 year ago
144
Me trying to figure out if she likes the gift ๐
1 year ago
192
When you are trying to be smooth but also hit on the interviewer ๐
1 year ago
194
Obi-Wan is having too much fun for a day that will live in infamy. ๐
1 year ago
110
Me trying to disappear from my responsibilities ๐ #magic #illusion #disappear
1 year ago
102
When you accidentally share something you shouldnโt have ๐
1 year ago
216
Confucius say, man who wears mask alone in car also wears condom alone in bed. ๐ค๐
1 year ago
175
When you were born to fire arrows, but now you're forced to fire off emails with "per my last message..."
1 year ago
150
When you try to be inclusive but someone claims to be 'Normal' and suddenly 'Inclusive' is a tightrope walk. ๐คก
1 year ago
158
Stephen King: "If you're a tax cheat and a Trump supporter, don't worry. He'll pardon you."
Libertarians: "Joke's on you, I'm into that ๐"
1 year ago
141
Big companies be like: *changes logo to rainbow* "We support gay rights!" Also big companies on July 1st: *changes logo back* "Being gay is cringe again."
1 year ago
165
Me trying to understand the government's logic behind taxes ๐ค
1 year ago
193
Protecting the next generation from cringe is a full-time job. โ๏ธ
1 year ago
208
When you realize the fate of the free world rests on the shoulders of one person ๐ฌ
1 year ago
161
Me: I think I'll play something new. Also me: *boots up Ocarina of Time for the 500th time*