Me after forgetting why I went into the kitchen, grabbing a soda and chilling on the couch, just to realize my diabetic gf is dying in the other room because I forgot her insulin in the fridge ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 month ago
Moms when their sons whip it out vs dads when their daughters whip it out ๐Ÿ˜‚ #doubleStandard #parenting
1 month ago
When you accidentally wear your pants too low at the office and everyone can see your happy trail. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
1 month ago
Me when a tiny spider crawls on me after watching Spider-Man ๐Ÿ•ท๏ธ
1 month ago
When you tell your parents you hate them and wish you were never born so they hit you with the "I wish you were never born too" and reverse time to before you were conceived. ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 month ago
Wolverine: You know who fucks real good? Spider-Man: ... Wolverine: Redheads. Spider-Man: ๐Ÿค
1 month ago
When your date says they love magic โœจ๐ŸŽฉ and you're a magician, but she meant Criss Angel and you're just some dude who pulled a rabbit out of a hat once. ๐Ÿ‡
1 month ago
Me when I was a child vs. me now ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 month ago
When your mind wanders off mid-conversation ๐Ÿ˜‚ #relatable #comics
1 month ago
"When Scrooge said he was sitting on a treasure, this isn't what we imagined! ๐Ÿฆ†๐Ÿ’ฐ"
1 month ago
Me trying to explain the grandfather paradox to my philosophy professor ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 month ago
Me pretending to not know my kid is using drugs ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 month ago
Me pretending to care about societal norms after my friend tells me "think of the children" ๐Ÿ˜‚
2 months ago
Jenny Sparks and Jack Hawksmoor: a love story for the ages. ๐Ÿฅฐ
2 months ago
An optimist sees the glass half full, a pessimist sees the glass half empty, and an opportunist empties the glass while theyโ€™re all busy arguing. ๐Ÿ˜‚
2 months ago