When fat cells sign a lifetime contract 😂🍔
When fat cells sign a lifetime contract ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ”
1 year ago
215
When pirating is smoother than a DVD intro marathon 🍿💻
When pirating is smoother than a DVD intro marathon ๐Ÿฟ๐Ÿ’ป
1 year ago
131
When you get Lacoste for your birthday and it's more loco than coste 😂
When you get Lacoste for your birthday and it's more loco than coste ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
174
When you're feeling Eeyore about your fuel economy but Winnie the Pooh about your RPMs 😂
When you're feeling Eeyore about your fuel economy but Winnie the Pooh about your RPMs ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
114
Me pretending to listen to her vent about Susan from accounting after I finish 😩
Me pretending to listen to her vent about Susan from accounting after I finish ๐Ÿ˜ฉ
1 year ago
133
When the Dark Knight attempts comedy 😂🦇
When the Dark Knight attempts comedy ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿฆ‡
1 year ago
166
When someone asks what my Asian friend looks like 🤔
When someone asks what my Asian friend looks like ๐Ÿค”
1 year ago
172
Me pretending I'm not addicted to having my phone at 100% 😂
Me pretending I'm not addicted to having my phone at 100% ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
191
"So, I hear you like bad boys?" 
"I open doors for the elderly and the disabled without assistance. And sometimes small children. But never myself."
"So, I hear you like bad boys?" "I open doors for the elderly and the disabled without assistance. And sometimes small children. But never myself."
1 year ago
188
When you skip leg day but accidentally max out on wing day 💪🐦
When you skip leg day but accidentally max out on wing day ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿฆ
1 year ago
181
Making jokes about dead babies = bad. Actually making dead babies = okay. 🤔 So, what's the difference again? 💀
Making jokes about dead babies = bad. Actually making dead babies = okay. ๐Ÿค” So, what's the difference again? ๐Ÿ’€
1 year ago
191
When you realize your elbows can see better than you... 🤯👀
When you realize your elbows can see better than you... ๐Ÿคฏ๐Ÿ‘€
1 year ago
171
Me after downing my 8th glass of water today, trying to shock my poor liver back into functioning 😂
Me after downing my 8th glass of water today, trying to shock my poor liver back into functioning ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
144
They fought for equality, and we gave them... cubicles. 😂
They fought for equality, and we gave them... cubicles. ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
124
Friend zone is a dangerous place. Many fall, few escape 😂
Friend zone is a dangerous place. Many fall, few escape ๐Ÿ˜‚
1 year ago
98