When you're having a bad day, just remember there's an artist out there who filled a phone booth with goldfish and called it art. ๐ ๐
1 year ago
34
If guns cause crime, then spoons make people fat, and pencils misspell words. Let's be real, it's not the tools, it's the choices people make! ๐ค
1 year ago
34
Husband has seen his wife in lingerie before... thousands of times! It doesn't seem to bother him, but he is over sunsets.
1 year ago
34
Me after a night out thinking I'm doing future me a solid ๐
1 year ago
34
When the game is so bad, it gives you AIDS ๐. Instructions unclear, disc stuck in microwave.
1 year ago
34
Me trying to explain to my family that I'm "talking" to someone online.
11 months ago
34
Me trying to explain to my girlfriend why the hairdryer was in the bathroomโฆ and not in the kitchen
11 months ago
34
When you realize Westeros is just a medieval version of Europe with dragons and ice zombies ๐
11 months ago
34
This chair is designed for all the lazy lovers out there. No more sore arms from holding your partner, just plop down and let the chair do the work ๐
11 months ago
34
Rihanna: *says she likes chains and whips*
Her ancestors in heaven: ๐
11 months ago
34
When you're expecting... quadruplets... but they're trying to escape ๐ฑ๐
11 months ago
34
Me trying to save the planet one fart at a time ๐จ๐๐
11 months ago
34
Me trying to convince myself that 2 years in a dead-end relationship wasn't a waste of time.
11 months ago
34
When she asks for batteries, she ain't talking about AAs ๐