When someone tells me people make them sick, I just nod and suggest a pressure cooker and a good Chianti ๐Ÿท
3 months ago
Me calculating if I can beat her man in a fight ๐Ÿค”
3 months ago
That explains why stormtroopers have such bad aim ๐Ÿ˜‚. They can't shoot or drive because they are always distracted.
3 months ago
When you love Jurassic Park a little too much ๐Ÿ˜‚
3 months ago
When you're a Terminator and can't remember which Sarah Connor is the right one. #JudgmentDay #WrongSarah
3 months ago
Me and the boys after realizing the ice cream truck plays the same song on repeat: ๐Ÿ”ซ
3 months ago
When your dad is the dark lord of the Sith, but it's 'Take Your Son To Work Day'. ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
3 months ago
Me after calling off on Monday: ๐Ÿš
3 months ago
Me trying to explain the Matrix trilogy to my friends after taking both pills.
3 months ago
When you realize you're part of the Empire and lose all the time. ๐Ÿ˜ญ
3 months ago
Me when my friend tries to show me another "news" article ๐Ÿ™„. All I see is ๐Ÿšฉ๐Ÿšฉ๐Ÿšฉ.
3 months ago
Morpheus: "The mainstream media lies about literally everything." Michael Scott: "Okay, I'm going to need you to verify that claim with a link to a credible mainstream media article."
3 months ago
Michael Bay be like: "Why create new CGI when you can just recycle the old ones? โ™ป๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚ #PearlHarbor #Transformers #BudgetCuts
3 months ago
When you ask your male friend to walk a mile in a woman's shoes, and he takes it *way* too literally๐Ÿ‘ 
3 months ago
Sean Connery to Steve Jobs: "You're a computer salesman. I'm f***ing James Bond!"
3 months ago