When dinner in the ER costs an arm and a leg! ๐คฃ๐๐ท
1 year ago
58
๐ For only $100 an hour, get yourself a life-sized Elf on the Fireplace! Stare included. ๐
1 year ago
58
When you're so emo, you put the 'rouge' in 'refuge' ๐
1 year ago
58
Me trying to convince myself that my life isn't that bad after all ๐ค
1 year ago
58
The truth they don't want you to know! It all makes sense now. I knew my recycling bin was suspicious. ๐ง
1 year ago
58
When you gotta go, you gotta go. Even if it means tactical potty breaks. ๐ฝ๐ช
1 year ago
58
My mother-in-law threw "The Exorcist" into the ocean because it was too evil. So naturally, I bought another copy, made it damp, and left it in her nightstand.๐
11 months ago
58
Why did the police officer cross the road? To beat the chicken for being black. ๐๐
11 months ago
58
When the dictionary changes its definition of words every 5 minutes ๐ #Confused
11 months ago
58
If abortion is murder, then my ex owes me a LOT of prison time for all those blowjobs.
11 months ago
58
Modern FPS games be like: "Why explore secret areas and defeat challenging bosses when you can just regenerate health and shoot generic enemies in a linear corridor?" ๐
10 months ago
58
Someone needs to give this dad a lesson on the difference between a private message and a family group chat. The secondhand embarrassment is real. ๐
8 months ago
58
Ah, simpler times when scandals were just sticky situations ๐๐ง
8 months ago
58
He makes a compelling argument, you have to admit. ๐ค๐
8 months ago
58
When you try to de-escalate but accidentally choose the 'start World War 3' dialogue option. ๐