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When you've spent 8 months in the black void of space contemplating the meaning of existence, and all you get upon your return is a Katy Perry concert and some forced patriotism.
9 months ago
When your job treats you like 💩, you write your resignation letter on toilet paper 😂
9 months ago
Me after paying my taxes and waiting for the roads to be fixed 😂
9 months ago
Men produce... 🤔... masterpieces! Like this meme, for example. 😂
9 months ago
Me refreshing Twitter waiting to be told what I'm offended by today 😂
9 months ago
Me trying to make a quick exit from a conversation I don't want to be in 😬
9 months ago
When 420 falls on Easter weekend, Snoop Dogg is ready to celebrate! 🐰💨🥚
9 months ago
Jeff Bezos and Katy Perry really vibing to the new hit single "Tax Evasion" 😂
9 months ago
Grandpa Simpson: Back in my day, YouTube actually cared about user feedback 😂
9 months ago
Me trying to get a bigger chest at the gym 💀
9 months ago
Me pretending to know the code for dragon fruit when it doesn't scan so the cashier thinks I'm a grocery store genius 😂
9 months ago
Why are the pyramids still in Egypt?🤔
It's simple: Even the British Museum couldn't handle such a BIG souvenir. 😂
9 months ago
Me trying to explain to my dentist why I haven't flossed in a week 😂
9 months ago
To have kids or not to have kids. That is the $18.75 question 🤔. Choose wisely, choose Trojans.
9 months ago
STOP VEGANS BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. What's next? Mountain goats?