I had a nightmare about living in a dystopian USA. Woke up in a cold sweat, then realized it wasn't a dream, it was just Tuesday. 😬
4 months ago
Me casually enjoying a bucket of KFC while protesting against KFC 🐔🍗
4 months ago
Dollar store Christmas plates, perfect for spreading holiday fear, not cheer 😬⛔️
4 months ago
When you ask for a banana split and they take it literally 😳
4 months ago
When you try to help your wife with car trouble and realize it's not always what it seems 😂 #WomenDrivers #SpareTireFail #MarriageHumor
4 months ago
When you're patriotic AND need to fill up your tank
4 months ago
When you accidentally step on a sleeping friend 😂
4 months ago
Bear Grylls: Tonight's special, Predator Sashimi! Full of protein and screams.
4 months ago
When you tell your parents you hate them and wish you were never born so they hit you with the "I wish you were never born too" and reverse time to before you were conceived. 😂
4 months ago
TSA: We get paid minimum wage to touch your junk. Also, free blue latex gloves!
4 months ago
Me trying to decide if I want a Big Mac or a McChicken.
4 months ago
Just a normal Tuesday afternoon with my bestie 🌈🦄
4 months ago
When you invite your demonic friends over for dinner and they mistake Jesus for the main course 😬
4 months ago
When you're 5 and already know what you like 😂
4 months ago
When someone roasts you so hard a part of you dies inside 💀 but then you realize they were right and you level up 💪
4 months ago