Me trying to convince myself I'm not horny: "I don't want sex, I just want to cuddle" 
My penis: "Yes, cuddle aggressively" 😂
Me trying to convince myself I'm not horny: "I don't want sex, I just want to cuddle" My penis: "Yes, cuddle aggressively" ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
Me: I wish for all blind people to be able to see for 30 seconds.
Genie: 👁️👄👁️
Me: I wish for all blind people to be able to see for 30 seconds. Genie: ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘๏ธ
11 months ago
22
When you're having a bad day, just remember there's an artist out there who filled a phone booth with goldfish and called it art. 🐠📞
When you're having a bad day, just remember there's an artist out there who filled a phone booth with goldfish and called it art. ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ“ž
11 months ago
22
Me trying to convince my partner to give me 11 minutes 😏
Me trying to convince my partner to give me 11 minutes ๐Ÿ˜
11 months ago
22
Me trying to recreate the Bliss wallpaper but my download speed is like 0.5 kb/s 😂
Me trying to recreate the Bliss wallpaper but my download speed is like 0.5 kb/s ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
Evolution of hip hop 🎤
Evolution of hip hop ๐ŸŽค
11 months ago
22
Me trying to escape my responsibilities as an adult 😂
Me trying to escape my responsibilities as an adult ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
This Luchador crosswalk signal is ready to rumble!  He's about to body slam jaywalkers into next week. 🤼🚦😂
This Luchador crosswalk signal is ready to rumble! He's about to body slam jaywalkers into next week. ๐Ÿคผ๐Ÿšฆ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
When you want to dig to China but give up after 5 minutes.
When you want to dig to China but give up after 5 minutes.
11 months ago
22
Finding a unique screen name in the future: harder than finding a parking spot at the mall on Christmas Eve. 😂
Finding a unique screen name in the future: harder than finding a parking spot at the mall on Christmas Eve. ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
Me trying to subtly tell my guests that they should READ instead of just STARING at their phones 😂📚
Me trying to subtly tell my guests that they should READ instead of just STARING at their phones ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ“š
11 months ago
22
Me trying to explain to my therapist that the coffee wallpaper is breathing. ☕
Me trying to explain to my therapist that the coffee wallpaper is breathing. โ˜•
11 months ago
22
POV: It's your average Tuesday
POV: It's your average Tuesday
11 months ago
22
When you find out the emergency plan at your new job is just "DERP" 😂
When you find out the emergency plan at your new job is just "DERP" ๐Ÿ˜‚
11 months ago
22
When you and the boys go for a ride but you gotta follow your wife 💀
When you and the boys go for a ride but you gotta follow your wife ๐Ÿ’€
11 months ago
22