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Me and the boys on our way to become cryptids ๐ฝ
1 year ago
166
When your Kia is a Mercedes, but society says it's a 2003 Honda Civic. ๐
1 year ago
154
Me pretending to listen to her vent about Susan from accounting after I finish ๐ฉ
1 year ago
106
When you try to slide into the DMs of your crush's hot cousin ๐
1 year ago
157
Me at 3 AM watching the 57th episode of "Building a Massive Underground Swimming Pool With My Bare Hands" ๐ด
1 year ago
164
When your side chic kisses your baby mama's belly and everyone's wearing matching outfits, you know it's true love ๐
1 year ago
163
Her: "OMG, it's HUGE!"
Me: "I know, right? I call it Mjolnir 2.0!"
1 year ago
89
So the Titanic hit an iceberg, but there are no iceberg pieces in the wreckage? ๐ค Must be the work of the Illuminati... or maybe the ice just melted? ๐คทโโ๏ธ
1 year ago
167
When someone tells you to cover up while breastfeeding. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize my baby's lunch was offensive. Here, let me just shove a bottle in their mouth real quick so I don't offend your delicate sensibilities."
1 year ago
166
Easy choice. Godzilla may destroy cities, but at least he won't try to explain to you why men are the root of all evil while you're trying to build a raft out of coconuts.
1 year ago
134
Me at 4 am wondering how tall people sleep with one blanket ๐
1 year ago
82
When you get banned for posting a slightly controversial opinion ๐ #FacebookJail #CommunityStandards
1 year ago
139
When a 6 year-old roasts their mom harder than any comedian could ๐. RIP Dad ๐.
1 year ago
154
Me realizing I'm the only one at the baby shower not pregnant๐คฐ
1 year ago
164
Finally, a use for old bras! These 'Petunia Perkies' are all the rage this season ๐๐บ