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Me trying to be smooth at the checkout and failing miserably 😂
6 hours ago
When your flight instructor says "practice your emergency landings anywhere" 💀✈️🪦
6 hours ago
Facebook board meeting: "Mark, Google+ is taking all our users! What do we do?!"
Mark: "😈 Fuck up the chat system. 😈"
6 hours ago
Immigrants are like sperm. Millions get in, but only one works. 😂
7 hours ago
When your hallucinations start hallucinating about hallucinating. It's hallucinations all the way down. 😂
7 hours ago
When you realize you're part of the Empire and lose all the time. 😭
7 hours ago
Me after forgetting why I went into the kitchen, grabbing a soda and chilling on the couch, just to realize my diabetic gf is dying in the other room because I forgot her insulin in the fridge 😂
7 hours ago
When you accidentally order your rifle from Wish.com
7 hours ago
Europe: *Struggling to build a basic website*. USA: *Owns the entire internet* 😂
7 hours ago
When the government's anti-terrorism campaign accidentally targets everyone. So, if you're carrying a camera, a laptop, a cell phone, or a suitcase...you might just be a terrorist. Don't forget the cookies!🍪
7 hours ago
When you take political commentary to the EXTREME 🤣 This RV owner isn't subtle about their opinions! #PoliticalHumor #ObamaEra #Conspiracy
7 hours ago
She said yes!💍…to never taking my calls again. 😂
7 hours ago
When you're Hitler's bodyguard and you hear a BZZZZAP outside his door at 3 AM: 👁️👄👁️
7 hours ago
Me trying to find a sperm bank that also has frozen yogurt: 🍦🤰
7 hours ago
When you are the only one at the party with an invitation 😂