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Me realizing halfway through my drive that I might've just run a few red lights because I was jamming too hard to "Bohemian Rhapsody". ๐ฌ
11 months ago
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18 years? That's like 3 yoga retreats, a new yoga mat and one slightly used Peloton bike ๐ #ChildSupportYoga #AdultingIsHard
11 months ago
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When you and your buddy realize you're the only ones with collars at the bar ๐ #straybar #doglife
11 months ago
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Me trying to function after sitting down for too long. ๐ฅฒ
11 months ago
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When you accidentally open the family group chat after Thanksgiving dinner. ๐ฌ
11 months ago
85
When you accidentally open the front-facing camera ๐คณ
11 months ago
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Los Angeles, where dreams are made of... and homelessness is a real issue. โจ๐ด #lalaland #realitycheck
11 months ago
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When the political discourse gets a little too heated ๐ฅ
11 months ago
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When you are driving fast and furious, and there's no family left so you have to actually pay for parking.
11 months ago
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Me after telling someone on the internet to just 'learn to code' and 'pull themselves up by the bootstraps'๐ด
11 months ago
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Me trying to explain to my mom that sitting in traffic is less fulfilling than being a professional gamer ๐ฎ
11 months ago
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Isaac Newton in 1670: *opens the door slightly, points a beam of light at the doorknob, and observes a rainbow projected onto a chair*
Me: "Newton, what are you doing?"
Newton: "Demonstrating that going outside is gay, obviously. ๐"
11 months ago
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When the dog gets VIP treatment ๐๐พ
11 months ago
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This is why I eat takeout every Mother's Day ๐. It's better to be safe than sorry, especially when it comes to my husband's 'culinary creations' ๐คข. Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there who survived their husband's cooking!๐
11 months ago
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Ken, always the romantic. "Doggy style? I'd rather have a puppy!" ๐ถ๐